Questions I ask myself

•  Did he know at our last wedding anniversary that we wouldn't make it to our next one? 
• How do I learn to trust again when my life has been a lie for so long?
• When will I stop hating myself for failing as a wife? 
• When will I stop hating him for failing as my husband?
• When will I realize all the lies I've told myself?
• What does moving on feel like? and When do I know I'm ready? 
• Will I magically feel better once the papers are finalized? Will I feel worse?
• How do I let go of the pain?
• Why do I feel like I need permission to be sad?
• Why am I afraid of crying? 
• What if I never find love again?
• What if I'm not lovable? 
• Who am I now?
• Who do I want to be now?
• Why is it so hard to ask for help?
• Do the waves of pain ever stop coming in? Or do they just get smaller? More infrequent? 
• Why did we give up on each other? Why was it so easy for us to do that?