When is it enough?

** TRIGGER WARNING- Discussion about mass shooting in America**

When is it enough.  Sandy hook- 27 innocent lives taken- most of them children- that wasn't enough to stop this madness? To say we need to think about how we provide access to guns and what types of guns we allow in this country?  

Today we woke up to another mass shooting. This time at a FedEx Facility in Indianapolis.  Why 9 years after Sandy Hook and 21 years since Columbine are we still allowing this to happen in our country? We need to not allow ourselves to be desensitized to this. 

I am staring my list of remembrance with the first mass shooting that I vividly remember. 

 Red Lake, MN 2005

Red Lake, MN 2005 10 Murdered 1 Suicide

Goleta, CA 2006 7 Murdered 1 Suicide

Lancaster, PA 2006 5 Murdered 1 Suicide

Blacksburg, VA (Virginia Tech) 2007 32 Murdered 1 Suicide

Crandon, WI 2007 6 Murdered 1 Suicide

Omaha, NE 2007 8 Murdered 1 Suicide

Kirkwood, MO 2008 5 Murdered by gunman, Gunman killed by Police

Dekalb, IL 2008 5 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Henderson, KY 2008 5 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Alabama 2009 10 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Fort Hood, TX 2009 13 Murdered

Binghamton, NY 2009 13 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Manchester, CT 2010 8 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Carson City, NV 2011 4 Murdered, 1 suicide

Minneapolis, MN 2012 6 Murdered, 1 Suicide 

Aurora, CO 2012 12 Murdered

Oak Creek, WI 2012 4 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Newtown, CT (Sandy Hook Elementary) 2012 27 Murdered, 1 Suicide 

Washington Navy Yard 2013- 12 Murdered

Herkimer, NY 2013 4 People Murdered by gunman, Single Gunman killed by police

Santa Monica, CA 2013 5 Murdered by gunman, gunman killed by police

Bell, FL 2014 7 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Marysville, WA 2015 5 Murdered 

Charleston, SC 2015 9 Murdered 

Roseburg, OR 2015 9 Murdered, gunman killed by police

San Bernadino, CA 2015 14 Murdered

Orlando, FL (Pulse Nightclub) 2016 49 Murdered 

Las Vegas, NV 2017 58 Murdered Hundreds Injured 

Sutherland Springs, TX 2017 26 Murdered 

Parkland, FL 2018 17 Murdered

Nashville, TN 2018 4 Murdered

Santa Fe, TX 2018 10 Murdered 

Annapolis, MD 2018 5 Murdered

Pittsburg, PA 2018 11 Murdered

Thousand Oaks, CA 2018 12 Murdered

Sebring, FL 2019 5 Murdered

Aurora, IL 2019 5 murdered, Gunman killed by police

Virginia Beach, VA 2019 12 Murdered, gunman killed by police

El Paso, TX 2019 22 Murdered

Dayton, OH 2019 9 Murdered, gunman killed by police

Gilroy, CA 2019 3 Murdered

Springfield, MO 2020 4 Murdered, 1 Suicide

Milwaukee, WI (Coors shooting) 2020, 5 Murdered, 1 Suicide 

Atlanta, GA 2021 8 Murdered

Boulder, CA 2021 10 Murdered

Indianapolis, IN 2021 8 Murdered, 1 Suicide 

And these are just a few. How many of these people would still be alive if we had more stringent gun laws in this country? These are people's children. They are parents. They had friends and families. They were senselessly murdered. When is it enough?  

If you are interested in learning about the shootings that don't make national headlines, please take a moment to look at the Gun Violence Archive. 

The Gun Violence Archive, which defines a mass shooting as one with four or more people injured or killed, not including the perpetrator, counted more than 600 such shootings in 2020, compared with 417 in 2019.

That carnage has continued into 2021, with 147 mass shootings as of April 16. (The archive, a nonprofit organization, has counted 11 mass murders, which it defines as four or more people killed, in 2021.)

Signing off for now

-C

Today Sucked

Today is world Me day. Not really Today is world Autism day. 

I've gotten a lot of people and even my own school district to post about acceptance over simply awareness to do away with the puzzle piece and welcome the infinity symbol, but today I've realized I don't just want acceptance I want radical acceptance. I want understanding. I want forethought into how things may impact the disabled community before being rolled out to the mass. I want questions about how to do better instead of living in complacency.  I want more than a post once a year and words in a newsletter.

Today I had a full break down in a training as a result of sensory overstimulation. This has never happened to me before. Today I became acutely aware of how I may have trigged students in the past as "NEW FLASH" not all Autistic people experience sensory stimulation in the same way. Today we were being trained on our new $700 Logitech cameras and multi-directional microphones.  Welcome to HELL. 

This camera which isn't focused on anything of merit like say the white board has a microphone that focuses on everything. It picks up typing, sneezes, it would pick up the stimming that I and some of my students experience in class, it picked up all the side conversations- so much for any privacy and to the students who shout out, my ears burned it was so loud.  It was difficult to hear the teacher and to pay attention to anything he was trying to teach with cacophony in the background.  

I have coping mechanisms. I put on my weighted blanket and sat with my Eeyore and tried to get through the training. That didn't work. I ended up breaking down in tears because I was so overwhelmed. I was shaking and crying and unable to control my body.  It took me nearly 2 hours to recover enough to be beneficial in meetings and frankly here 6+ hours later I'm still totally out of spoons and will not be anywhere close to functional this evening.  (processing through writing actually helps me) 

I am 32. I had my favorite coping mechanisms at my full disposal. I was in a space in my home that was comfortable. I could escape if I needed to. What does this mean for our students?

For my students who struggle with processing information how will this overwhelm them?

For my students who need to know who is talking for transcription services- how will this impact them?

For my students like me who struggle with too much auditory input- how will they continue to engage in learning? 

For my students who struggle daily to engage anyway, will this push them away? 

For my students who have private conversations with teachers accidentally broadcast to the whole class as we "Figure out tech" what does this do to their mental health? 

Today was rough. Today I gained new insights into the experiences of some of my students. Today I gained more worry  of what our adventure into "in person learning" holds. 

I encourage all of my colleagues to  think about how the tools they use in class may be overwhelming or overstimulating to students. Is there another way for the student to engage and to demonstrate learning that doesn't involve that tech? 

Thanks for your time

-C